Cowboy’s Prayer By Clem McSpadden Our
gracious and Heavenly Father, We pause
in the midst of this festive occasion, Mindful
and thoughtful of the guidance that You Have
given us. As cowboys, Lord, we don't ask for any special favors. We ask only that you will let us compete in this Arena as in life's arena. We
don't ask that we never break a barrier, draw A
steer that won't lay, draw around a chute-fighting Horse
or a bull that is impossible to ride. Help us compete in life as honest as the horse we Ride and in a manner as clean and pure as the wind That blows across this western country. So, when we make that last ride that we know is Inevitable, to the country up there — where the grass Is green and lush and stirrup high and the water runs Crystal clear and deep, You will tell us, as we enter That Arena, our entry fees are paid. We
ask these things in Christ's name.
Horse Dictionary - A Bit - What you have left in your pocket after you've
been to your favorite tack shop.
- Bog Spavin - The feeling of panic when
riding through a muddy area. Also used to refer to horses who throw a fit at having to go through water puddles.
- Colic - Gastrointestinal result of eating at horse fair food stands.
- Colt
- What your mare always gives you when you want a filly.
- Contracted foot - The
involuntary/ instant reflex of curling one's toes up - right before a horse steps on your foot.
- Dog
House - What you are in when you spend too much money on grooming supplies and pretty halters.
- Drench
- Term used to describe the condition an owner is in after he administers electrolytes to his horse.
- Easy
Rider - Rides good in a trailer; not to be confused with "ride-able."
- Easy
to Catch - In a 10x10 stall.
- Easy to Load - Only takes 3 hours, 4 men,
a 50lb bag of oats, and a tractor with loader.
- Endurance ride - The end result
when your horse spooks and runs away with you in the bush.
- Equitation - The ability
to keep a smile on your face and proper posture while your horse tries to pigroot, shy and buck his way around the track.
- Feed - Expensive substance utilized in the manufacture of large quantities of
manure.
- Fences - Decorative perimeter structures built to give a horse something
to chew on, scratch against and jump over (see inbreeding).
- Flies - The excuse
of choice a horse uses so he can kick you, buck you off or knock you over - he cannot be punished.
- Founder
- The discovery of your loose mare-some miles from your farm, usually in a flower bed or hayfield. Used like-"Hey, honey,
I found'er." You could also say that founder is a condition that happens to most people after Christmas dinner.
- Gallop- The customary gait a horse chooses when returning home.
- Gates
- Wooden or metal structures built to amuse horses.
- Grooming - The fine art of
brushing the dirt from one's horse and applying it to your own body.
- Hay -
A green itchy material that collects between layers of clothing, especially in unmentionable places.
- Head
Tosser - A blonde-haired woman who wears fashion boots while working in the yards.
- Heaves
- The act of unloading a truck full of hay.
- Hives - What you get when you receive
the vet bill for your 6 horses, 3 dogs, 4 cats, and 1 donkey.
- Hobbles - Describes
the walking gait of a horse owner after his/her foot has been stepped on by his/her horse.
- Hock
- Financial condition of all horse owners.
- Hoof Pick - Useful, curbed metal tool
utilized to remove hardened dog doo from the treads of your endurance shoes.
- Horse Auction
- What you think of having after your horse bucks you .
- Inbreeding - The breeding
results of broken/inadequate paddock fencing.
- Jumping - The characteristic movement
that an equine makes when given a vaccine or has his hooves trimmed.
- Lameness
- The condition of most riders after the first few rides each year; can be a chronic condition in old or weak riders.
- Lead Rope - A long apparatus instrumental in the administration of rope burns. Also used
by excited horses to take a handler for a drag.
- Light Cribber - We can't afford
to build anymore fencing or box stalls for this buzz saw on four legs.
- Lunging
- A training method a horse uses on its owner with the purpose of making the owner spin in circles-rendering the owner dizzy
and light-headed so that they get sick and pass out, so the horse can go back to eating.
- Manure
spreader - Horse dealers
- Mosquitoes - Radar equipped blood sucking insects
that typically reach the size of small birds.
- Nicely Started - Lunges, but not
enough health insurance to even think about riding him.
- Parasites - Small children
that get in your way at endurance rides.
- Pinto - A colorful (usually green) coat
pattern found on a freshly washed and sparkling clean gray horse that was left unattended in his paddock for ten minutes.
- Pony - The true size of the stallion that you bred your mare to via AI - that
was advertised as 15 hands tall.
- Proud Flesh - The external reproductive organs
flaunted by a stallion when a horse of any gender is present. Often displayed at rides.
- Quarter
Cracks - The comments that most Arabian owners make about the people who own Quarter Horses.
- Race
- What your heart does when you see the vet bill.
- Rasp - An abrasive, long, flat
metal tool used to remove excess skin from the knuckles.
- Reins - Break-away device
used to tie horses with.
- Ringworms - Spectators who block your view and gather
around the ring sides at BC workouts.
- Sacking out - A condition caused by Sleeping
Sickness (see below). The state of deep sleep a mare owner will be in at the time a mare actually goes into labor and foals.
- Saddle - An expensive leather contraption manufactured to give the rider a false
sense of security. Comes in many styles, all feature built-in ejector seats.
- Saddle Sore
- The way the rider's bottom feels the morning after the weekend at a ride.
- Sleeping
Sickness - A disease peculiar to mare owners while waiting for their mares to foal. Caused by nights of lost sleep,
symptoms include irritability, red baggy eyes and a zombie-like waking state. Can last several weeks.
- Splint
- An apparatus that can be applied to various body parts of a rider due to the parting of the ways of a horse and his passenger.
- Stall - What your truck does on the way to a ride, fifty kilometers from the closest
town.
- Strappers - Heavy, stationary objects used at endurance rides to hold down
chairs and skies.
- Tack Room - A room where every item necessary to work with or
train your horse has been put, in a place which it cannot be found in less than 30 minutes.
- Three
Gaited Horse - A horse that. 1) trips, 2) stumbles, 3) falls.
- Twisted Gut
- The feeling deep inside that most riders get before a ride starts.
- Vet Catalog
- An illustrated brochure provided to horse owners that features a wide array of products that are currently out of stock
or have been dropped from a company's inventory.
- Well Mannered - Hasn't
stepped on, bitten, or kicked anyone for a week.
- Withers - The reason you'll
seldom see a man riding bareback.
- Yearling - The age at which all horses completely
forget the things you taught them previously.
- Young stock - A general term used
for all equines old enough to bite, kick or run you over, but not yet old enough to dump you on the ground.
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Rodeo Superstitions
1. Never Set Your
Cowboy Hat on a Bed It could lead to a major injury
or even death. This belief comes from the close association of sleep with death (eternal rest, etc.) and the dangerous
lifestyle of a rodeo cowboy.
2. Never Lay Your Hat Down Like You Set it on Your Head
All the luck will run out!
3. Never Let Someone Wear Your Hat
You’ll end up taking them home.
4. Never Wear Yellow in the Arena
This superstition could be contributed to that fact that yellow is not a very popular color. More likely it's because
yellow is associated with cowardice and so you won't see too much yellow in the arena.
5.
Always Shave Before a Performance Always
clean yourself up for lady luck.
6. Cowgirls Often Wear Different Color Socks on Each Foot
7. Never Compete with Change in Your Pocket
It might be all you'll win. Rodeo life is really a tough life. Unlike other sports competitors, rodeo cowboys do not receive
a salary. Success is tied to winning and winning alone. This hard reality makes cowboys and cowgirls try to give 100% each
time they compete because without the prize money you can't pay entry fees at the next show.
8. Don't Eat Peanuts or Popcorn Eating
this small and dried food can cause you to choke.
9. Never Kick a Paper Cup at a Rodeo
Paper cups have a tendency to spook horses as they blow (or are kicked) around. This can lead to some pretty bad results.
10. Saddle Bronc Riders Should Mount Right Foot First
Strangely enough this may go back to the Middle Ages, and is a direct link to the modern cowboy from the knight of Medieval
Europe. Passed from Spanish knights called Caballeros on to the Vaquero and then the cowboy.
The theory goes that knights would mount from stands during jousts and would stick their feet in right side stirrups first
due to the fact that the left side or sinister side was considered bad or evil. If this is the true reason for this belief,
or something else is, it makes for a really interesting superstition.
11. Eat a Hot Dog Before
the Rodeo
12. Never Read your Horoscope on Competition Day
This superstition has something to do with tempting your luck.
13. Keep a Cross on Your
Riding Hat You never know what is
going to happen.
14. Never Play With Another Person’s Crutches
You will end up using a pair some day.
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